Using self-loathing creatively
Being overly critical of our work and ourselves can deflate our creative vitality. But we can also use self-criticism for powerful and meaningful creative work, such as writer and director Nicole Holofcener has done with her new film "Friends With Money."She comments in an article, “I think that some of my own self-loathing is definitely in there. You know, when I recognize things about myself that I don't like, and that I'm ashamed of. Like my materialism, or the fact that I'm not saving children in Ethiopia. That I care about petty things. As I get older, more mature, I learn to forgive myself my human foibles. But I also put them out there. I am that person who wants that piece of furniture, because it's cool and nice. But I can also see myself wanting that piece of furniture, and how repellent that is to the person who can't even afford to pay their rent or buy health insurance, or send their kids to a decent school.
"All that self-awareness is enough to just make you want to stay in bed. ... I'm as repellent as everybody else. But somehow I can forgive myself, because I think, well, I know I'm repellent. [Laughter.] Is that better? If you know what you sound like? I don't know.” [Salon.com April 6, 2006]
This self-criticism isn’t, of course, a “female problem.” Actor Pierce Brosnan [”James Bond”] once commented, “I know what it’s like to loathe oneself. To feel that deep self-loathing. It’s painful and ugly and f**ing unwanted. You think, Am I smart enough? Am I equipped enough to deal with it all? You don’t want it to happen, but it’s part of life.” [Life mag., Dec 2 2005 - quoted on the page self-criticism]
Lesley Sword, director of Gifted and Creative Services, Australia, notes in an article that gifted children [who happen to grow up to be gifted adults] are “highly self critical and express dissatisfaction with themselves; they see what ‘ought to be’ in themselves... They can become despondent sometimes even depressed, at their perceived failure.”
[Continued in my article: Being Creative and Self-critical]
Nicole Holofcener also admits, “Secretly I like to disturb people.”
And isn’t that what potent art often does?
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Neurolinguistic Programming
In the early 1970s in America Richard Bandler, then a young college student studied the work of Fritz Perls and later Virginia Satir and found that he could reproduce their high-level therapy skills to a degree that even surprised him. Bandler seemed to have a natural ability to mimic (model) the language patterns by Virginia and Fritz.
At the University of California at Santa Cruz, Bandler who was well versed in the teachings of patterns in mathematics and computers teamed up with a college professor, John Grinder to help him understand the processes that were at work. Soon Bandler and Grinder, who used what he knew about patterns in linguistics, created a new model for personal growth called NeuroLinguistic Programming.
Bandler and Grinder had set out to model the hypnotic skills of Milton Erickson. They had astounding results. They built a communication model about human "thinking" and "processing" and used that model of how we see images, hear sounds, reproduces smells and tactile experiences in our mind to track and model the structure of subjective experiences.
Sounds very complicated but really it works very simply. Here is an example as used by Paul McKenna - probably the best & most successful hypnotist in the world.
Close your eyes and think of a negative memory. Become involved in the situation as best as you can. Feel the emotions that you felt, see the things you saw and hear the things you heard.
Now take that memory and project it onto a mental screen seeing yourself in the picture. Put a frame around the picture and view it as if it is an old photograph. Next drain all the colour from the picture and shrink the screen to the size of a matchbox.
Have the feelings associated with the picture decreased in any way?
Another good example of NLP involves Anchors. Have you ever smelt a certain perfume or aftershave and had it remind you of a certain person or situation? Gone to a certain place that brings feelings long forgotten flooding back? Or been in any situation that creates emotional responses that would not normally be associated with it? Well if you can answer yes to any of these then you have experienced anchors. Some anchors are associated with positive feelings and some with negative emotions. However, you should be aware that anchors can be consciously installed or already existing ones altered. Here is an example:
Think of a time when you were really happy. If you can't think of one then imagine something that would make you feel really happy. See what you would see, hear what you would hear and feel what you would feel. Really get into the picture and try to experience it as though it were happening now.
Now brighten the colours and make them richer. Increase the volume. Make the picture bigger, brighter, louder. That's it and more and more....
Now press your first finger against your thumb and fully experience your happy feelings. Do this everyday for 2 weeks and you will create an anchor that will instantly recreate these feelings. Whenever you want to feel like that again just press your thumb and first finger together and wham the feelings will come flooding back! Don't believe me? Just try it and see!!! hypnosis
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