“Openness doesn’t come from resisting our fears but from coming to know them well.”
Pema Chodron – director of Buddhist monastery Gampo Abbey.
In the safety of a movie theatre, it can be fun to get scared by a monster like Dr. Hannibal ‘The Cannibal’ Lecter (Anthony Hopkins) in “The Silence of the Lambs.”
But in real life, we may be facing a number of more internal anxieties about realizing our talents, about reactions of other people etc, that can limit our growth and happiness.
Psychiatrist Judith Orloff, M.D. thinks “Fear is the biggest energy thief there is. A master seducer and gigantic source of negative energy, fear shamelessly robs of us of everything good and powerful, preys on our vulnerabilities.”
She adds that “No one escapes. The wise ones admit it, and eyes open, confront and heal fear. The ones who’re in trouble look the other way, and bit by bit, get eaten alive. The point is to stay conscious. When we know what we’re dealing with, we decide who’s in charge.”
From her article : Breaking the Trance of Fear.
Hale Dwoskin (CEO and Director of Training of Sedona Training Associates) explains one of the topics explored in The Sedona Method is “that anything that we are afraid of happening, we actually have a subconscious desire for or expectation of happening.”
(This is also explored in psychoanalysis, such as the wish/fear concept of Freud.)
Dwoskin suggests an exercise of “bringing to mind something about which you feel afraid or anxious.. simply observe and welcome it.
“Now, ask yourself: ‘Could I let go of wanting this to happen?’ or ‘Could I let go of expecting this to happen?’
“The question may have made you laugh. ‘Oh, come on,’ you said. ‘I don’t actually want this to happen!’
“Well, try asking the question again, and notice what else you discover. In fact, if you go back to that same thing now, you may already be able to discern a difference.”
From article Fear and Anxiety.
In an excerpt from her book “Happy For No Reason” [on the Sedona site], Marci Shimoff calls her “dear friend” Hale Dwoskin “one of my Happy for No Reason mentors,” and describes a simple metaphor of using the Sedona Method.
“When I met Hale, letting go was not my strong suit. Sometimes I fought my negative thoughts and feelings, but mostly I was the queen of holding on to them—doggedly determined to figure them out, to understand where they came from and what they meant.
“I didn’t think I could just let my thoughts and feelings go. It seemed too ridiculously simple. What helped me finally get it was a little demonstration Hale showed me of how letting go works.
“Try it for yourself. First, get a pen. Now hold the pen tightly in your hand—the pen represents your thoughts and feelings and your hand is your awareness. Notice that although gripping the pen is uncomfortable, after a little time it begins to feel familiar or ‘normal.’
“Are you feeling that yet? In this same way, your awareness holds on tightly to your thoughts and feelings, and eventually you get used to holding on and don’t even realize you’re doing it.
“Now open your hand and roll the pen around on your palm. Notice that your pen and your hand are not attached to each other. The same is true for your thoughts and feelings. Your thoughts and feelings are no more attached to you than the pen is attached to your hand. You are not your thoughts or feelings.”
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