Ready to be extraordinary

I was a bay tree / Quiet and unseen
I lived in stories / But inside I kept a mystery
I was a starling / Nobody’s darling
Flying in perfect circles / Just for company

And now I’m ready …..
And now I’m ready to be Extraordinary

Mandy Moore expresses thoughtful perspectives in her lyrics and interviews on some of the personal aspects of how talented people become outstanding, exceptional, extraordinary.

Asked by an interviewer, What’s extraordinary about you?, she replied, “I’m still figuring it out. To me, it [her new album "Wild Hope"] was my way and my mantra and anthem to find those things about myself that I love and to celebrate them and not feel the need to deflect or apologize if someone pays me a compliment.

“Because I’m pretty bad about that. I’m pretty shy. It’s hard for me to say, “This is what I love about myself!” out loud. I think I can say it to myself and enjoy it, but it’s a little difficult still.” [From alloy.com interview.]

Being shy or introverted can impede how well or how much you put yourself “out there” to be seen by others. In her article The Gifted Introvert, Lesley Sword notes, “Western civilisation today is dominated by the extravert viewpoint. This is because extraverts outnumber introverts 3 to 1, are more vocal than introverts and are more understandable than introverts.”

But being introverted can also mean you value solitude, and more naturally avoid people who are negative.

Guy Finley says in his article Seven Simple Exercises to Invite the Extraordinary Life, that “The Extraordinary Life visits individuals, not groups or organizations. It strengthens the soul willing to be alone for its sake. Keep your distance from people who insist that you believe as they do, who hope to convince you that the reality they have satisfied themselves with should satisfy you as well.”

Like many talented people, Moore admits it is hard to give herself credit for her strengths and positive qualities.

Healthy criticism can help refine our talents and creative projects in the pursuit of excellence. But when it is based on a excessive perfectionism or an unrealistic self concept, criticism can be destructive and self-limiting, eroding our creative assurance and vitality.

Many creative people, even when they have achieved recognition for their talents, may experience self-critical thoughts and insecurity.

[More in my article Being Creative and Self-critical.]

Mary-Elaine Jacobsen, PhD (author of The Gifted Adult) writes in her article Encountering the Gifted Self Again, For the First Time, “Though others may consider them extraordinary success stories, many times gifted adults secretly feel like failures – “I haven’t done enough, gone far enough, soon enough.”

“This is particularly problematic for gifted women who often think of themselves as impostors or frauds, believing it is the proverbial others who are truly intelligent or talented.”

Moore says of creating ‘Extraordinary’ and other songs on her new album “Wild Hope“: “It was something I’m very passionate about and I wanted to be a part of the process. It didn’t feel like I was pushing myself in the wrong direction or really pushing myself at all…

“I learned a lot about myself, actually…I got some clarity as to why I felt certain ways in certain situations. I think I’m a lot stronger than I give myself credit for.” [LiveDaily interview.]

That sense of doing something in the “right direction” is described as “flow” and is one aspect of high level creativity and achievement [see my article Creativity and Flow Psychology.]

In the same interview, Moore also talks about her emotional challenges while she was writing: “I was having a very, very low period and it was quite confusing for me. I don’t know if I could officially call it depression, but I was definitely not myself and very out of sorts. I still have my daily bouts with it and struggle with it.”

[Also see earlier post: Mandy Moore on depression and sensitivity.]

Depression and anxiety affect many creative people, and dealing with those and related mood issues is another way we can help ourselves become more fulfilled and outstanding. See the articles and quotes in the section Depression and Creativity.

There are many other aspects of being extraordinary, such as courage.

As writer Anais Nin declared, “It takes courage to push yourself to places that you have never been before, to test your limits, to break through barriers.” [From my article Courage and creativity.]