Talent Development Resources...............abuse & creative expression : page 4

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"Nothing exaggerates the torture of childhood, People say children are happy. They forget the terrible revelations... the sudden shadows on the ceilings."    Virginia Woolf, incest survivor "It is these very experiences [of rape and molestation] which have shaped the person I am now. Without these experiences, there would not have been the drive and ambition to overcome and strive for more."    Minerva M., abuse survivor from article Cognitive Accommodations to Sexual Abuse by Douglas Eby / related page: Virginia Woolf

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The Hours [DVD].. conveys this sense that inner space is as vast, dramatic and surprising as outer space. Of course, the impulse to keep thinking about this movie owes something to worry about what it leaves out. .... I worry that the absence of even a hint of the sexual abuse and isolation that left Woolf with childhood flashbacks and a lifetime of trauma -- beyond what society was willing to talk about then, but inexplicably left out of Cunningham's novel [The Hours] and this film -- may make her depressions seem a personal fault. from article: 'The Hours' captures the merit and suspense of introspection  and the importance of living in the present -by Gloria Steinem ... [LA Times, Jan 12 2003] ..more quotes on page:**Virginia Woolf ....related book: Virginia Woolf: The Impact of Childhood Sexual Abuse  on Her Life and Work - by Louise A. DeSalvo

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In Poof!, my character, Loureen, damns her husband to Hell, and he goes. He turns to a pile of ash.  And it's a turning point in a person's life. It's a point where somebody stands up and says, "I can't do this anymore." .... I wasn't a victim of domestic violence. I, unfortunately, was the victim of child abuse, and I don't know if it's similar. I remember one guy tried to put his hands on me, and I lost it. And that's why I understood a part of this character, because I went into a fit or rage. First I ran, and then I called him and said, "If you ever put your hands on me again, I'll kill you... I know you're stronger than me, but I'll find a way." I couldn't believe that came out of my mouth.

.. .. I'm not a violent person. I'm not even an angry person -- I play angry people, but I'm not an angry person.  And the work that I do with women in prison, I relate to them because what separates us is that when they snapped, they reacted in one way, and when I snapped, I reacted another way. But we were one-in-the-same when we snapped. Rosie Perez - from Kentucky Educational Television page about her play "Poof!"

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.. .. indieWIRE / Sarah Jacobson : How exactly did you decide to make this film ["Things Behind the Sun"]? Allison Anders : I had gone back to Florida to deal with my own rape crisis... About 10 [other films] in the whole history of cinema [deal with an actual rape].  The films that I looked at as inspiration were both directed by women. One by Ida Lupino called "Outrage" made in 1950. It's about a young girl who's about to get married and she's raped.  She eventually leaves her town, leaves her fiance, just leaves everything to go deal with this thing that happened to her and to come through it. It's an amazing movie.  And then the other movie was Martha Coolidge's "Not a Pretty Picture," made in 1977, which is a really interesting film of Martha actually making a movie about her own rape.  She's directing the actors to act out her rape, very similar to what I did except that Martha's actually in the movie. /// I don't think that people generally know what the hell they're talking about when they put a rape in a movie. They don't know what it is, they don't know what it looks like, they don't know how easy it is. ///

indieWIRE : Most feminists will try to separate rape from sex to keep the titillation from entering the discussion, but then you've talked about how rape is about sex.  Anders : Absolutely. It did get across in the '70s that the idea of rape was "not her fault."  However, when you take sex out of rape, how the fu*k are you supposed to heal your sexuality after that?  Because your sexuality is definitely going to be affected. If it happened to you as a child you're going to have this complicated thing of -- often, not always -- you're being turned on by the very things that were repellent.  And so by taking sex out of rape, it just leaves the rape survivor with this: "It was violence; it wasn't sex. Okay, why is my sexuality so different now?" from article Here Comes "the Sun" -  Allison Anders Out of the Past -  By Sarah Jacobson, indieWIRE, Aug 17, 2001 ~ ~ ~ "People are too happy to make a comedy about a child molester [referring to Todd Solondz's "Happiness"], but they will not make a serious film about rape." Allison Anders. from article Female Persuasion - by Jamie Painter,  Back Stage West, 1998 Things Behind the Sun...

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Mariska Hargitay became interested in helping organizations responding to sexual assault crimes through her series "Law and Order: SVU" "You hear people that had their story told on our show and now they can talk about it, and.. the healing begins and the shame goes away," she said on tv show The View. Hargitay co-founded The Joyful Heart Foundation, an organization devoted to healing and recovery of survivors of rape and sexual assault through the use of dolphin-human therapy.  She is also on the board of advisors for SAVI, the Sexual Assault and Violence Intervention Program, Mount Sinai School of Medicine, and she works with the Rape Treatment Center, Santa Monica

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.. .. Similarly, when a woman reads male-authored texts in which rape is eroticized or the result of female "seductiveness," she has already "consented" to the text's perspective by imaginatively "becoming" male. In a rape scene, then, she reads as the male rapist while also responding (perhaps less consciously) as the objectified, raped woman.  However, if the text arouses her, she becomes like the abused child who is sexually aroused by caresses that are nonetheless involuntary and abusive.  Identifying these dynamics helps readers to understand how gender hierarchies can be manipulated within texts as well as why many contemporary women writers have chosen to rewrite rape from the perspective of the raped woman or child.

Being a survivor complicates being a teacher, just as it complicates being a mother, a partner, or anything else.  One can't simply avoid all texts that contain sexual abuse. It would mean eliminating William Shakespeare, John Webster, Mary Shelley, Percy Bysshe Shelley, Lord Byron, Edgar Allen Poe, Richard Wright, Ralph Ellison, and many, many more. /// Even the story of Lot's daughters in the Old Testament blames daughters for incest instead of fathers, legitimating theories of "seductive daughters" centuries before Freud (Gen. 19:31).  Thankfully, there are now also many feminist texts about rape and incest. Toni Morrison, Alice Walker, Jane Smiley, Sharon Olds, and Dorothy Allison are just a few who have turned the claims of perpetrators inside out.  In the process, they've assembled a stunning indictment of religion, the family, and male supremacy.  Carolivia Herron's Thereafter Johnnie, for example, views incest through the Biblical stories of Noah and the Flood, Jacob's Ladder, the Crucifixion and the Christian Apocalypse as well as on Macbeth and Yeats' poem, "Leda and the Swan"... Johnnie, a daughter born of father-daughter rape, is a messianic figure whose birth heralds the end of the world. from article Teaching Rape and Incest -  by Elizabeth Breau [thirdspace] image from book Thereafter Johnnie - by Carolivia Herron

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.. .. My husband punched me in the eye. What is wrong with that sentence? It follows all the rules. Subject, verb, direct object. A simple sentence.  I could go to the board and, chalk dust flying, diagram it just as Miss Montgomery taught me to in seventh grade. The sentence is true. My husband is no longer a husband, much less mine, but he did punch me, and it was in the eye, the right eye because he's a lefty, in December 1986. Why, then does this sound better to me: He gave me a black eye? I have been mulling this question over. My poet's ear prefers "he" to the more awkward "my husband."  My aggrieved soul wants to keep "him" at bay. But this does not have to do with me alone, or even with me and him. That form-- "x" gave "y" a black eye--is the one we more often hear.

I am at a writing colony for three weeks. I have nothing else to do; I intend to figure this out. I look up synonyms in the thesaurus I find in my writing shed.  Hit, strike, smite; poke, jab, smack; and then the "nonformal terms": belt, bash, paste, bonk, slug.  They all work pretty well in the simple subject-predicate form. He hit her in the eye, struck her, smote her, poked, jabbed, and smacked her, slugged her, pasted one on the kisser.  But he didn't punch me in the mouth. He gave me a black eye. I suspect that we pull our punches, when it comes to blackened eyes. ....excerpt from Black Eye: Escaping a Marriage,  Writing a Life by Judith Strasser quotes and photo from judithstrasser.com Judith Strasser is a freelance writer who conducts poetry and memoir writing workshops for adults and children. From the Publisher : Seventeen years after she married, Judith Strasser escaped her emotionally and physically abusive husband and sought a better way to live.  In the process, Strasser rediscovered what she had suppressed through that long span of time: exceptional strength and a passion for writing.

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.. .. Another challenge [writing for Law & Order: Special Victims Unit] has been to make it not just gratuitous blood and guts but to offer educational messages of value to women.  The majority of our viewers are women. .... It primarily appeals to women because delicate subjects like rape are treated with respect in the show.  Our detectives treat the complaints as real, important, and not the victim's fault. ///

On sitcoms it's mostly guys, usually with one token female, but on SVU it's an advantage to be female.  Robert Palm originally wanted all women on the show because he felt we were better character writers.  Because of the subject matter, few men can be empathetic enough. It's hard to put yourself in that position of identifying with rape victims.  Our successful male writers all have had really strong feminine sides.  "SVU" staff writer Lisa Marie Petersen from article "Dawn DeNoon and Lisa Marie Petersen  take back the night" - by Alan Waldman  (October 2002 issue of "Written By")

*related page:**screenwriting / playwriting...........related article:.....Women in Film: Identity and Power

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.. .. I think domestic abuse has always been a part of my life, always, from as long as I can remember. Either my home or a friend's home. ... And the legacy that it gives you and hands down to you is this whole idea that [the abuse] was your fault. That.. if you were good enough, if you were sweet enough, if you were pretty enough, that you could have stopped it. And that is the curse, because of course you have no power to stop that through being pretty enough or sweet enough and nice enough. So you grow up trying to be nice enough, and pretty enough, and sweet enough. And you stifle that voice inside of you. ///

To have the courage to stop that cycle is.. a tremendous challenge, I have to say. ...  I think that people don't think that the black woman's voice is valuable enough. It certainly is born out of racism. I always said that rape was not called rape until it started happening to white women. /// I'm an actress. I've been a professional actress for 10 years, and I have to say that since I have been in the business, I just get this sense that you are kind of put in a bucket as a black actress or as a black woman.  You are not seen as pretty, especially if you go past a certain skin tone. You are not seen as smart. You are not seen as feminine or sexual.  You are seen as this strong, invincible, almost masculine figure. I think those are the preconceived notions that society has with black women. And perhaps that's why they have been treated the way they have been treated throughout the years. Viola Davis from Kentucky Educational Television page about her play "Poof!"

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Andrea Ashworth is speaking about her book "Once in a House on Fire" which has been praised by reviewers such as Carol West of the NY Times, who called it a "mesmerizing and poetic memoir of violence, abuse, racism and poverty." Her choice of nonfiction as her first work was a matter of wanting to deal with her past, and then be able to move on to writing fiction. She is currently working on her first novel. "I wanted to get my memories out because I wanted to pin them down, so that all those ghosts wouldn't go streaking across the novels," she explains. from interview by Douglas Eby

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.. .. Sexual Abuse of Males By now everyone must have been made aware of the epidemic of child sexual abuse that has long existed but only recently been acknowledged in this country.  Cases of abuse are frequently reported in the news, and thousands of adults molested as children (AMAC's) are coming out of the silence and into treatment. The image of the sexual abuse victim that comes to mind for most people is that of a young woman. But, in fact, males are also victims of sexual abuse. Sexual abuse of children is most often perpetrated by male members of the victim's family, but exceptions are common: many children are abused by women and by people who are not family members.

.. ..  The abuser can be anywhere from a few years, to many years, older than the victim -- it's the imbalance in power that comes with age difference that is often critical and that distinguishes childhood exploration from sexual exploitation.  The abuse can range from violent or manipulative oral, anal or vaginal intercourse, to inappropriate touching, to sexually threatening comments and looks.  Abuse can be a one-time event or it can consist of repeated violations over many years.  from UCLA Student Psychological Services page photo at left: Kevin Bacon, center. as a molesting  prison guard in the film based on the memoir Sleepers above: Tim Robbins as abuse survivor in movie  based on the novel Mystic River by Dennis Lehane

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.. .. Oprah Winfrey : Do all those people who are doing that, and you've talked to hundreds, maybe thousands of them, do they realize they're hurting the children? Andrew Vachss : So what happens to people like this [child molesters], pain is part of their enjoyment.  To the sexual sadist, without pain -- without evidence of pain, there's no fun.

.. .. Oprah Winfrey : Well, you know, when I was molested by my uncle, I remember one of the things he said when it was over, he said, "I can't believe I did this to my own niece." I carried that with me for many years... from interview originally broadcast on  The Oprah Winfrey Show, July 16, 1993  [posted on Vachss site]

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Domestic violence is the topic of Ashanti's new hit "Rain on Me". The music video takes a bold look at the issue and features Ashanti facing, and ultimately overcoming, the realities of abuse.  Determined to help end relationship violence and educate young people about the issue, Ashanti has partnered with the Family Violence Prevention Fund (FVPF) to raise awareness by working with LidRock to create a mini-movie of the music video.  Proceeds from sales of the mini-movie will support the violence prevention work of the FVPF. And remember, if you need help, talk to someone you trust. You are not alone.  some lyrics of RAIN ON ME 1st verse:  I'm looking in the mirror at this woman down and out she's internally dying and no this is not what love's about. I don't want to be this woman the second time around cause I'm waking up screaming no longer believing that I'm going to be around. Over and over I try and over and over you lie over over and over I cry

.. ..     Chorus:  Rain on me Lord why don't you take this pain from me. I don't wanna live I don't wanna breathe can you just rain on me Lord why don't you take this pain from me I don't wanna live I don't wanna breathe quotes from Family Violence Prevention Fund FVPF

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Summer's coming, bringing with it another onslaught of horror movies to entertain and titillate -- you know, get the old juices flowing.  But there's more to why we lust after this genre than the old heart-thumping, chill-up-the-spine feelings they induce, said Dr. Daniel Lapin, a San Francisco psychologist in private practice.  Those who write horror stories and movie scripts may be unconsciously working out their own childhood abuse, said Lapin, who specializes in working with adults who were abused as children.  And those who read the books and watch the movies may also be dealing with childhood abuse. .... According to Lapin, Bram Stoker, the author of Dracula, was abused as a child.  "Whenever we find people who have been traumatized, they are repeating things again and again. Stoker has all the characteristics of anybody who's stuck in a repetition compulsion."  from article Authors talk horror in well-lighted place -  by Cristy Shauck, Cupertino Courier ....The vampire, Dracula and incest : the vampire myth, Stoker's Dracula,  and psychotherapy of vampiric sexual abuse - by Daniel Lapin ...related page :...the shadow self : page 4

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.. .. "Blue Car" stars Agnes Bruckner as Meg.. whose only solace is her poetry and the attentions of an English teacher, Auster (David Strathairn), that become increasingly problematic. "I'm really interested in inappropriate relationships," writer and director Karen Moncrieff says with a laugh.  "I like all the dark, difficult feelings that most of us don't want to admit to, like being attracted to somebody you shouldn't have sex with because they're underage, or being attracted to pain, or wanting to give away our power to somebody who will improve us somehow." What makes "Blue Car" less exploitative than it could have been - despite an unsavory motel-room scene in which Auster seduces Meg - is Moncrieff's deft handling of the actors and their roles. As Strathairn puts it, "She wanted Auster to be vulnerable, not a predator. You see his complications. He's a crippled person, but there is a potential for redemption. He tried to help this girl but fell prey to his own desires." In Bruckner, Moncrieff found someone who not only related to Meg's distress - the actress' parents had divorced five months before the shoot - but was willing to tackle the emotionally -troubling scenes.

.. .. "The places where I thought I had to push her the most were the areas of sexuality," Moncrieff says.  "That created a very interesting tension that's palpable onscreen. We talked, before I cast her, about how I would shoot the hotel room scene. I wanted her to feel protected." "I was creeped out by the whole thing," admits Bruckner, now 17. "But David and I were really close by that time. And Karen, David, the cameraman, the boom guy, and the camera assistant all wore boxer shorts [in solidarity with her while shooting the scene]. So that made me feel more comfortable." "During the experience of having sex with this man, Meg goes from being a girl to seeing him for who he is, seeing that a sexual relationship with him is not going to solve all her problems, is not going to fill her up, is not going to save her," Moncrieff says.  "I think that there is something in girls - and women - who are searching for father figures. They sometimes trade their sexual power for some other sort of connection." from article: No soft soap for Karen - by John Clark,  nydailynews.com April 20, 2003

*related pages:.....relationships: teen/young adult......self-esteem / self concept.......sexuality : teen/young adult

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.. .. One of the best examples of a battered woman is portrayed in The Burning Bed, starring Farrah Fawcett.. based on the book.. by Faith McNulty. The powerful drama earned an Emmy-nomination for Fawcett. The movie opens on March 9, 1977, in Dansville, Michigan, when Francine Hughes tells her children to get in the family car and then proceeds to incinerate the family home with her husband asleep in the bedroom. She is promptly arrested and when she meets with her attorney, he urges her to tell him the history of her husband's abuse. Instead, she says, "I loved him. I did." /// Hughes does not have a steady job when they marry. A year later they are still living with his parents.

He is verbally abusive and controlling. He does not want her to leave the house or to wear clothes that compliment her figure. Her mother does not sympathize with her and, in fact, says, "Women, they have to put up with their men. Especially if there are children... You make a hard bed, you have to lay in it." When told he is physically abusive, Francine's mother condones his behavior, "I know he is jealous, but that's only natural. He loves you. It's not really so bad, is it?" /// On the day that she kills her husband, he is extremely violent and tells her that she must quit school; that demand is the breaking point. She tells him she will not quit. He tells her if she does not, he will kill her. He also tells her if she ever tries to leave him again he will kill her. In that decisive moment, she decides to kill him. That night, she burns the house with Hughes drunk and asleep in the bed. from article: Broken Vows: Domestic Violence in Films -  by Liza T Powers The Burning Bed [VHS] (1984) The Burning Bed: The True Story of an Abused Wife  by Faith McNulty

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.. .. Extremities(1986) - starring Farrah Fawcett Marjorie is returning home from work and stops at a corner store. Upon returning to her car, she is accosted by a masked stranger who puts a knife to her throat and forces her to drive to a remote location.  When the stranger changes from the back to the front seat, Marjorie is able to distract him and escape from the car. She reports the incident to the police who are sympathetic, but can do nothing. Realizing that her attacker has her ID and so knows her address, she lives in fear of his return.

One weekday a week or later, she remains at home while her two housemates, Terry and Patricia, go off to work.  While at home, a man comes in the front door and claims to be looking for a friend of his... it soon becomes obvious that this is Marjorie's attacker and he has returned to carry on where he left off.  He terrorizes Marjorie, forcing her to dress up in provocative clothes, ordering her to make him a meal, and then making her say she loves him and wants to make love with him.  As the stranger begins to force himself on Marjorie, she is able to reach some insect repellent which she sprays in his face, temporarily blinding him.  This allows her enough time to gain the upper hand, tying the stranger up and entrapping him in the house's fireplace while she decides on her next move. .... [from dvdverdict.com review] Extremities [dvd] -- included in book William Mastrosimone Collected Plays

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