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Might as well use them if you’ve got them!
By Yee-Ming Tan, Positive Psychology News Daily
Do strengths translate well to workplaces in China? I run positive
leadership workshops in Shanghai and Hong Kong, and recently came
across an experience in which the strengths-approach was challenged.
“This assessment doesn’t tell me my weaknesses, it only contains
strengths. I don’t get it! What’s the point of an assessment that
doesn’t tell you your weaknesses? How can I improve if I don’t know my
weaknesses?” Chen shouted from the back of the room.
Chen
(changed from
his real name) and his colleagues, all highly educated senior managers
of a Scandinavian shipping firm, attended my positive leadership
workshop in Shanghai two months ago. His colleagues were just as
puzzled by the absence of weaknesses in their VIA report.
[See
the
site: Authentic
Happiness: Using the new Positive Psychology.]
Chen’s top five strengths are: Fairness, Authenticity, Kindness, Love,
and Humility.
He is
confused. There is a dissonance between his
reported strengths and his real-life persona. He is known to have a
quick temper and regularly fights with his customers. He knows his
biggest weakness is the inability to control his temper.
In coaching, the power of the VIA character strengths is
not in the identification of strengths but in the integration and the
shift that come afterwards.
Often
a good debrief is required before the individuals can fully make sense
of what to do with his or her strengths.
Marcus
Buckingham’s Go
Put Your Strengths To Work [website] is a great resource on
applying strengths at the practical level.
You
can read a great summary of this book at Using
Strengths When You Work by Kathryn Britton.
I used the following questions to debrief Chen.
Ming Tan: How much do you own these strengths
(Fairness, Authenticity, Kindness, Love, and Humility)?
Chen: Definitely fairness, authenticity and
humility. But I don’t think I am kind, especially not loving.
Ming: This is interesting. The survey results come
from your answers. Let’s explore this a bit.
In
what situations do you display kindness and care? To whom might you
show your kindness? We play different roles in life, and we can behave
differently in different roles.
Perhaps
you show more kindness in one role and less in another role?
Chen: That’s true. I am kind to my wife and my
daughter. I am also like this with my friends. But I am not kind at
work. How can I be kind and caring at work? We need to fight for our
business.
When
my client is being unreasonable, unlike my colleagues who are passive,
I will fight back.
Ming: I can see the strength of fairness and
authenticity coming into the picture now. When you sense something is
unfair, that is where you might get into arguments with other people.
Let’s
try this. How do you behave when you are being kind?
Chen: I’m tolerant, willing to listen to other
people, considerate, just like when I am with my daughter. I am
patient, willing to listen to her, a lot of give and take.
Ming: Great. So let’s take another step. Take the
case of your tendency to argue with your client. If you were to tap
into your top five strengths, how could these strengths be applied in
such a situation?
Chen: Fairness will ensure that I can always balance
the needs of my client and our company position. Yes, I see it now.
Instead
of getting into arguments which damage the relationship, I can apply my
kindness and empathy here. I can be more patient and be willing to
listen to my clients.
Even
if they were wrong, I can show some humility too. In the past, when I
sense injustice or unreasonableness, I immediately blow up.
Ming: Seems like you’re found a way to tap into your
strengths to deal with a real life situation. Let me know how it works
out for you when you are back at work.
Chen emailed me three days later. He had almost started an argument
with a client. He remembered to apply his kindness and empathy just
before he lost his cool.
Because
he was able to switch to listening and appreciating his client’s
perspective, the issue was resolved quickly. He received a big “thank
you” from the client afterwards.
Chen had been aware of his temper problem, but the traditional
deficit-approach had only exacerbated his frustration.
He had
tried
many ways to no avail: learn to be patient, learn to see things from
other people’s perspective, suppress his temper, use calming techniques
etc.
He
finally succeeded by tapping into his strengths, and did so with
minimal effort or exertion of self-control.
According to Clifton and Harter (2003), people can change on the
changeables but most efficiently through who they are to begin with.
In
Chen’s case, his development echoes the strengths approach described by
Clifton and Harter: identification of talent, integration into one’s
view of self, and changed behavior.
As a footnote, I caught up with Chen yesterday. His integration of
strengths has helped him turn his former business contacts into
friendly relationships.
His
clients and he are on the same team - not on opposite teams - making
his work more fun and meaningful.
I
asked him to share his insights on strengths approach and he said,
“Might as well use them if you’ve got them!”
References:
Buckingham, M. (2007). Go
put your strengths to work. New York: Free Press.
Clifton, D.O., & Harter, J.K. (2003). Investing in Strengths. In A.
K.S. Cameron, B. J.E. Dutton, & C. R.E. Quinn (Eds.), Positive
Organizational Scholarship (pp. 111-121). San Francisco:
Berrett-Koehler Publishers, Inc.
Article source: Positive
Psychology News Daily Sept 23, 2008
Yee-Ming Tan, MAPP, provides executive coaching services
and leadership development training to senior executives. Recent
clients include: Cathay Pacific, Goldman Sachs, and Microsoft. Yee-Ming
also publishes a series of tools, RippleCards, for people who choose to
cultivate greater well-being in their lives.
Yee-Ming Tan's website - Third Thinking
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