“As creator and innovator, one is required to prove the commitment to one’s pursuits, the power of one’s will and courage to create. After a while reality relents and you are allowed to cross the threshold into new creation.”

That is a quote by Jean Houston, who notes that being a creator often includes barriers, challenges and pains along with the passion to create.

Here are more excerpts from her stimulating essay The Alchemy of Creativity and the Social Artist, starting with a section on the challenges of having many more ideas than you can ever accomplish.

Just remember when you are tormented by unfinished projects, the agony of the great Leonardo Da Vinci himself who existed in a torment of self hatred because of finishing so little, the ambivalence that the creator feels toward the creation, may be both the shadow and the impetus for the creative process itself.

Creative people blame themselves, but I personally believe that it is part of the entropy process of the universe.

It has been my experience that whenever I was trying to do something truly innovative every bit of trivia rose up to keep me from my task, every roaring self-doubt I had ever had loomed before me to vitiate my intent, to challenge my commitment.

This is perhaps part of the homeostasis effect by which the earth tries to keep itself going on in the same way.

As creator and innovator, one is required to prove the commitment to ones pursuits, the power of ones will and courage to create.

After a while reality relents and you are allowed to cross the threshold into new creation.

As social artists, how do you get around this ambivalence, not be plagued with feelings of suicide as was Hemingway or driven to drown one’s creativity in drink or drugs, as were too many or get caught in one or another obsessive cycle of some repetitive action or task that would take up so much of your time and interest that you could justify your lack of creation.

There are I believe several ways.

One is to observe your nausea quotient. I find for example that with myself, that whenever I am staying away from creation too long either in small or larger cycles I am afflicted by little and then larger increments of nausea.

I am caught in a static loop and the nausea warns me that it is time to get back to the task or experience even greater nausea and self-disgust.

Another is to take everything that you really are ambivalent about — men, women, your own inadequate childhood — and write it out, play it out, turn it into satire, make it interact with the wildest associations.

One of the great hidden talents that all human beings have is for associative thinking, and there is something about the impossible association that breaks the hold of the ambivalence over us.

Picasso, for example, whose wife spent four hours every morning just coaxing him to get out of bed and get on with it, could only actually do so after he had thought of an impossible association that would shatter all expectations.

Another way is to get a high tolerance of ambivalence, what Keats called a Negative capability which he describes as being when a person “is capable of being in uncertainties, mysteries, doubts, without any irritable reaching after fact and reason.”

What we would now call holding the tension between things, or living at our edges.

Fortunately, we live at a time that is History at its edges, and which demands our genius as well as our ability to act.

By Jean Houston – from her much longer essay The Alchemy of Creativity and the Social Artist [pdf] – listed on her site as “Creativity and the Social Artist” on the Social Artistry Resources page.

One of her books: A Passion For the Possible: A Guide to Realizing Your True Potential.

Amazon.com Review: “Over the past 30 years Jean Houston has dedicated her life to helping people unleash their creative and spiritual potential. As a result she has worked with some of the greatest cultural and spiritual visionaries of our time, such as Margaret Meade and Joseph Campbell. In A Passion for the Possible, written as a complement to the PBS series by the same name, Houston explains what helps people become creative geniuses. The trick is to fully commit to the four levels of self (sensory, psychological, mythic, and spiritual). Acting as a guide to the interior world, Houston once again inspires readers to embody their true potential.”

Having many more ideas than you can ever accomplish, feeling tormented by unfinished projects – Maybe you can relate to those experiences. I certainly do.

Maybe they are more or less inherent aspects of being multitalented.

In my book Developing Multiple Talents – The personal side of creative expression, I quote Hank Pfeffer (author of article “The Too Many Aptitudes Problem”) that “Strong talents do not equal high performance. Having the right knacks or talents provides a head start and ongoing advantage. … Aptitudes have to be trained in order to be used well. Peak performance occurs when one has the right combination of talents, knowledge, motivation, opportunity, courage, luck, tools and the X factors.”

If you want to develop your multiple talents as an entrepreneur, take a look at my Inner Entrepreneur post The Renaissance Business system for the Multi-Passionate Entrepreneur.

~~

Image: the lightness of being ~ by AlicePopkorn. Her caption:

“You must not let your life run in the ordinary way; do something that nobody else has done, something that will dazzle the world. Show that God’s creative principle works in you.” -Paramahansa Yogananda

~~

Online podcast presentations by multiple “Thought-Leaders And Role Models on Extraordinary Achievement – Helping You Succeed Under Pressure”

Free live online presentations May 21st – May 25th.
Recordings available after the Summit.

From the site:

Why do some people perform at their best under pressure and others choke?

What’s the difference between those who not only survive but thrive when faced with incredible challenge – and those who cut their losses and throw in the towel?

It’s not skill, talent or knowledge. And it’s not superior training or genes.

The “X factor” — that unmistakable quality that escapes easy definition — is mental toughness. And you know it when you see it.

… It’s the 140-pound farm kid from Nebraska who’s never seen the ocean before making it through the rigorous Navy SEALs training – while the former Olympic athlete drops out.

… It’s basketball unknown Jeremy Lin coming out of the D-League to lead the Knicks on a winning streak.

… It’s the 13-year-old winner of the National Spelling Bee spending countless hours in solitary practice with numerous spelling study guides and the dictionary to steadily improve her final ranking during five consecutive years of competition.

… And it’s tech entrepreneur Eric Migicovsky persevering in the face of rejection by potential investors to raise a record $7.1 million to fund development of his innovation through crowd-sourcing

Across every arena, the ability to drive relentlessly toward a goal despite failure, adversity and plateaus — to display grit when the going gets rough — that’s mental toughness.

One of the free presentations:

“Choke: Why We Blunder Under Pressure and How The Secrets of the Brain Can Help Get It Right”

• The “curse of expertise” and how the way pressure affects our performance depends on the activity and the type of memory required
• The “Obama effect” and other common stereotypes on performance
• Techniques that cure choking

LIVE: Thursday, May 24th at 9:00 AM PDT | 12:00 pm EDT | 6:00 PM CEST (Free recording available for 24 hours after)

SIAN BEILOCK, Ph.D, is a psychology professor at The University of Chicago and one of the world’s leading experts on the brain science behind “choking under pressure” and the many factors influencing all types of performance: from test-taking to public speaking to your golf swing.

She is the author of Choke: What The Secrets of the Brain Reveal About Getting It Right When You Have To.

See the list of presenters and sign up for

The Mental Toughness Summit

There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique.

And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and will be lost.

The world will not have it.

It is not your business to determine how good it is, nor how valuable it is, nor how it compares with other expressions.

It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open.

You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work.

You have to keep yourself open and aware directly to the urges that motivate you.

Keep the channel open.

No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction whatever at any time.

There is on a queer, divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others.

Quotes by Martha Graham, in the book: Martha: The Life and Work of Martha Graham, by Agnes De Mille.

The Wikipedia page declares her influence on dance “has been compared with the influence Picasso had on modern visual arts, Stravinsky had on music, or Frank Lloyd Wright had on architecture.”

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Laurie Anderson is one of my favorite multitalented artists, with creative skills in many directions.

Here are some highlights from her Wikipedia profile:

She is an American experimental performance artist, composer and musician who plays violin and keyboards and sings in a variety of experimental music and art rock styles. Initially trained as a sculptor, Anderson did her first performance-art piece in the late 1960s.

Throughout the 1970s, Anderson did a variety of different performance-art activities. She became widely known outside the art world in 1981 when her single ‘O Superman’ reached number two on the UK pop charts.

She also starred in and directed the 1986 concert film Home of the Brave. In February 2010, she premiered a new theatrical work, entitled Delusion, at the Vancouver 2010 Olympic Games.

Anderson is a pioneer in electronic music and has invented several devices that she has used in her recordings and performance art shows…

Her website laurieanderson.com has more up to date information on her projects, such as the first exhibition of her paintings in New York, and The Experimental Media and Performing Arts Center at RPI naming her its first distinguished artist in residence.

In an interview, she talked about her life as an artist.

Do a little of this and a little of that…

Q: You have carved out your own place in culture, touching on elements of performance art and pop and new music and other things. But there remains no easy explanation or categorization for what you do. Is that actually a sign of success, from your viewpoint?

Laurie Anderson: You have to think about if you want to be pinned down as one thing or another. It’s hard to create an image that is so concrete and stable. That takes PR people. Nobody’s like that.

I much prefer being able to flit around. It’s just the way I am, from the time I was 5, doing this, doing that. I always wanted the freedom to change my mind and do different things.

Fortunately, my parents always said, “You know what, you don’t to have to decide what you’re going to be, ever. You can be something different every day if you want.”

I’m just doing what they told me do: Do a little of this and a little of that, don’t get trapped.”

Being predictable

Q: As an artist, you felt there was a predictable pattern you were slipping into?

Laurie Anderson: Oh sure. Many artists share that feeling, especially artists in their 50s, I think. I was talking to some of those people–my people–at a benefit the other night. We were talking about how you start something and then people identify you with that, and you keep doing it. It’s hard to get that excited anymore.

I don’t feel that, the lack of excitement, or at least not often. But I do know what they’re talking about, when you say to yourself, “Oh, should I do another one of those? What time is it?”

From article: Her Private Happy Meal, by Joseph Woodard, Los Angeles Times, January 27, 2002.

Video: Laurie Anderson: Can Artists Change the World?

Photo from facebook.com/LaurieAnderson

Lower image from book Laurie Anderson, by Roselee Goldberg.

~~

This poster is for the 2012 Cannes Film Festival. An image of Marilyn Monroe with a birthday cake was selected to help mark the festival’s 65th birthday.

Cannes released a statement about the choice: ”Fifty years after her death, Marilyn is still a major figure in world cinema, an eternal icon, whose grace, mystery and power of seduction remain resolutely contemporary.

“The Festival poster captures Marilyn by surprise in an intimate moment where myth meets reality — a moving tribute to the anniversary of her passing, which coincides with the Festival anniversary.

“She enchants us with this promising gesture: a seductively blown kiss. The Festival is a temple of glamour and Marilyn is its perfect incarnation. Their coming together symbolizes the ideal of simplicity and elegance.”

But don’t believe all quotes attributed to Monroe herself.

“Imperfection is beauty. Madness is genius, and it’s better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.”

This is a widely circulated quote, supposedly by Monroe, but the webpage Janie’s take on Marilyn Monroe – part of the Immortal Marilyn site - says “There are five quotes assigned to Marilyn that are exceedingly popular… However,  not one of them has a discernible source. There are no records, (whether in interviews, writings, or press conferences) of Marilyn ever saying any of these, and when explored most of them seem highly unlikely.”

The very popular quote above, the writer continues, “once it’s parsed it does not sound like Marilyn at all. ‘Imperfection is beauty’? Marilyn was well known as being an absolute perfectionist, asking for take after take on the movie set until she felt she got her scene just right. She refused to give moviegoers anything less than what she felt was her absolute best.

“She would apply her makeup only to wash it all off and do it over again, taking hours to prepare so that she presented herself to the public as nothing short of absolutely perfect. After a photo shoot she would pore over contact sheets, destroying any images that she didn’t approve of.

“In a 1960 interview, she did say: ‘My one desire is to do my best, the best that I can from the moment the camera starts until it stops. That moment I want to be perfect, as perfect as I can make it.’ Hardly seems that someone so hard wired to perfectionism would say ‘Imperfection is beauty.’.

“As to the second part, “Madness is genius”, this seems even more unlikely. Marilyn’s mother suffered from severe mental illness that traumatized the actress when she was a child. As an adult, Marilyn’s biggest fear was inherited madness like her mother’s. Considering her first hand account with what madness truly was, and her deep rooted fear of it, how likely is it that she would declare it ‘genius’? Not very.”

Perfectionism

Monroe commented about her occasional infamous delays in coming to a set to start shooting: “I believe you shouldn’t do anything in life until you’re ready.”

Director George Cukor said “Marilyn’s delays are neither irresponsible not careless. She doesn’t want to do a scene until she is ready for it and can give it her best.”

[Daytona Beach Morning Journal - Jul 17, 1960.]

This reminds me of another of my favorite actors: Nicole Kidman. In working with her on their film “Portrait of a Lady,” director Jane Campion was quoted: “She can be quite murderously challenging in her perfectionism.

“Take Twenty: ‘Are you sure that’s good enough?’ [she says]. We’re going, wearily ‘Yeah.’”

From my article Perfectionism.

Also see posts on my High Ability site on Perfectionism.

[Photo: "Marilyn Workin' It" - available from Art.com and Amazon.com]

Another source book of quotes is “My Story” by Marilyn Monroe with Ben Hecht [see link at bottom, in the list of books].

The author of the webpage Janie’s take on Marilyn Monroe [mentioned above] notes, “While there has been heated discourse on just how much Marilyn contributed to it and how much was ghostwriter Ben Hecht, Marilyn did sit for interviews for the book, and did approve the final writing before abandoning the project over printing issues.

“Also giving it some credibility is that the anecdotes presented in My Story are echoed in Marilyn’s own voice in her 1960 interview with Georges Belmont.  These are some quotes found in My Story that we can safely attribute to Marilyn:

“Hollywood’s a place where they’ll pay you a thousand dollars for a kiss and fifty cents for your soul. I know, because I turned down the first offer often enough and held out for the fifty cents.”

“I knew I belonged to the Public and to the world, not because I was talented or even beautiful, but because I had never belonged to anyone or anything else.”

Another quote:

“When you’re famous, you kind of run into human nature in a raw kind of way.”

Ayn Rand wrote a commentary in the Los Angeles Times, two weeks after Marilyn Monroe’s death on August 5, 1962.

Referring to the “sordid and horrifying childhood of Monroe, Rand wrote: “To survive it and to preserve the kind of spirit she projected on the screen – the radiantly benevolent sense of life, which cannot be faked – was an almost inconceivable psychological achievement that required a heroism of the highest order.”

From my Inner Actor site post Actor’s Privacy and The Dark Side of Fame.

A final quote from “My Story”:

“I knew how third rate I was. I could actually feel my lack of talent, as if it were cheap clothes I was wearing inside. But, my God, how I wanted to learn! To change, to improve! I didn’t want anything else. Not men, not money, not love, but the ability to act.”

Her statement of “a lack of talent” is more about her insecurity, rather than an objective evaluation of her abilities.

In Part 1 of this article, I quoted acting teacher Lee Strasberg :

“In her eyes and mine, her career was just beginning. The dream of her talent, which she had nurtured as a child, was not a mirage.”

Here are a couple of my posts on this topic, which impacts so many high ability people:
‘I’m a Fraud’: Gifted and talented with insecurity
Artistic confidence – Insecurity and acting

~~

Books

Marilyn & Me: A Photographer’s Memories, by Lawrence Schiller.

Fragments: Poems, Intimate Notes, Letters – by Marilyn Monroe, edited by Stanley Buchthal and Bernard Comment.

The photo above is used for the cover of that book.

“The library of Marilyn Monroe contained over 400 books on a variety of subjects, reflecting both her intelligence and her wide-ranging interests.  No surprise to those familiar with Monroe, they were the books of a well-read and inquiring mind.  Works of Literature, Art, Drama, Biography, Poetry, Politics, History, Theology, Philosophy, and Psychology covered the walls in her library.” From website: “Man’s Supreme Inheritance” – A Book from Marilyn Monroe’s Personal Library.

Marilyn Monroe, by Eve Arnold. – “Following a 1952 photo shoot for Esquire magazine, Monroe and Arnold forged a wonderful friendship. Marilyn Monroe chronicles the six photography sessions that took place over the course of their 10-year bond, including a two-month-long session while Monroe was shooting The Misfits.” [Amazon.com summary]

Blonde: A Novel – “Joyce Carol Oates boldly reimagines the inner, poetic, and spiritual life of Norma Jeane Baker — the child, the woman, the fated celebrity and idolized blonde the world came to know as Marilyn Monroe.”

My Story – by Marilyn Monroe, with Ben Hecht.

Video – Marilyn Monroe – The Final Days, Narrated By James Coburn

~~

At least one news story refers to her as a “Self-proclaimed introvert.”

By the way, I am not presuming Kristen Stewart is shy, introverted or highly sensitive, and I don’t know her personally.

But just from my gut reaction to seeing her in movies and interviews, she may – like many other very talented actors – have any or all of those traits.

Not that they are the same thing.

See my post Shyness, Introversion, Sensitivity – What’s the Difference?

[Photo from Official Site for the Snow White and the Huntsman.]

What is interesting is the reactions by some reporters, and their interpretations of her behavior.

A USA Today article said, “Visibly shaking with stage fright, Stewart tended not to say much in front of the crowds.” (Kristen Stewart in a different light at Sundance, By Anthony Breznican, Jan 25, 2010.)

A Los Angeles Times article (For Kristen Stewart, this is her dawn, by Chris Lee) said she “appeared to not enjoy the red carpet activities” and referred to her “continuing hostility toward the celebrity limelight” and that she “appeared visibly repulsed by the red-carpet action.”

In a New York Times article, Brooks Barnes wrote about “Ms. Stewart’s shyness and hints of awkwardness,” but added those qualities “make her accessible to fans.”

The article adds that Stewart “has coped with the suffocating attention by giving off an air of inapproachability, a tough exterior that Chris Weitz, the director of New Moon, said she has methodically adopted.”

“Jodie Foster, the article continues, “who co-starred with Ms. Stewart in David Fincher’s ‘Panic Room’ said ‘Kristen isn’t interested in blurting out her emotions all in front of her, and that results in really intelligent and interesting performances.’”  [From Media Vampires, Beware, by Brooks Barnes, nytimes.com]

Getting more comfortable with experience

Kristen Stewart does seem much more relaxed and confident and expressive in more recent videos of interviews, compared with ones she was doing earlier.

She says, “I think I’ve gotten a lot more comfortable with talking about myself and knowing that what you say, people are really going to take into consideration.

“That always intimidated me so much that I minced every word that came out of my mouth. I couldn’t finish a sentence because I was so concerned about how it was going to sound. I didn’t want to come across insincere about something that I really love to do.” [From dawnmasuoka.com interview 21 Nov 2009]

“You stuck-up party-pooper”

Introversion- or shyness-related actions like “holding back” in interviews and public appearances (and ordinary conversation, for those of us who aren’t celebrities) can often lead to negative judgments and reactions from others, such as fans writing that she is aloof, a snob, obnoxious or rude.

Writer Sophia Dembling comments in a post on her Psychology Today blog The Introvert’s Corner:

Introverts  tend to be, by nature, fairly mild-mannered. But that doesn’t mean we don’t silently-and sometimes not-so-silently-seethe.

Look at poor Kristen Stewart, an introvert in the limelight. This young actress (Bella Swan in the wildly popular Twilight movies) gets all kinds of grief because she was awkward on Oprah, hates being stalked by paparazzi, and generally doesn’t seem to enjoy the pander-to-the-public aspect of her acting career.

“I think it’s funny that when I go onstage to accept an award, they think I’m nervous, uncomfortable, and awkward–and I am–but those are bad words for them,” she recently told Elle magazine.

Dembling lists a number of reactions we introverts may get from other people (in Stewart’s case often very publicly) that can inspire us to feel: “I f***ing hate it when they say…” – reactions such as “She’s stuck up.” “You don’t know how to have fun.” “Party pooper!” “You hate people.”

From her post How To Piss Off An Introvert.

Paparazzi can be assaultive

In an interview for the July issue of British Elle, Stewart said about some paparazzi photos of herself:

“What you don’t see are the cameras shoved in my face and the bizarre intrusive questions being asked, or the people falling over themselves, screaming and taunting to get a reaction. The photos are so…

“I feel like I’m looking at someone being raped.”

But she quickly apologized, telling People mag.: “I really made an enormous mistake – clearly and obviously. And I’m really sorry about my choice of words… ‘Violated’ definitely would have been a better way of expressing the thought.”

She has done PSAs [Public Service Announcements] for the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network (RAINN) and played a rape victim in her 2004 film “Speak.”

I don’t know if this is one of the photos Stewart was thinking of, but there are others I’ve seen where she seems really angry or stressed.

Of course her remark about rape was extreme, but hopefully it did get more people aware of how assaultive paparazzi can be – and forced publicity appearances, especially for sensitive people.

More depth

“There’s a threat to her health in the way she works, in that she can’t project feelings she doesn’t feel herself,” Stewart’s “New Moon” director Chris Weitz said.

“If you shoot a scene in which she has a nervous breakdown, that’s potentially what you’re going to get. I have found myself concerned for her at moments.” During the filming of Twilight, studio executives found themselves concerned about Stewart and co-star Robert Pattinson. “Both of them have the tendency to go deep, to find the emotional core of a scene,” says the first movie’s director, Catherine Hardwicke. [ELLE mag. interview by Amanda Fortini, May 05, 2010]

Pattinson, has also referred to himself as introverted, and others have called him shy. Actor Christian Serratos (who plays Angela in the movie) thinks all the frenzied fame has affected Pattinson: “If anything he’s become more humble and more introverted.” [okmagazine.com]

Signs of sensitivity

Many highly sensitive people experience the kind of strong concern for authenticity and truthfulness, and caution (even perfectionism) when speaking that Stewart mentions above.

Another indication may be how much she cared about creating her character Bella in “Twilight” and making her dialogue ring true.

A magazine article noted, “Stewart, who was just 17 when she shot the movie, was uncompromising about what she’d allow her character to do and say. ‘We had to rewrite and improvise a lot of the most intense scenes, because Kristen will not say something if she doesn’t feel good about it,’ recalls [director Catherine] Hardwicke.”

[Entertainment Weekly, Nov 14, 2008 - posted on kristenstewartweb.com]

Source of video clip (from 2007): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qf_9vVWtSzQ

More on the personality traits

Shyness – “Although most shy people feel they are more shy than other people, shyness is a self-reported characteristic of personality that is expressed by over 40% of those surveyed. Only about 7% of Americans surveyed indicate that they have never experienced shyness in their entire life. Thus, shyness is a pervasive phenomenon; if you are shy, you are not alone.”

From The Shyness Research Institute at Indiana University Southeast.

The director Bernardo J. Carducci Ph.D. is author of Shyness: A Bold New Approach.

Wikipedia says “Shyness is a social psychology term used to describe the feeling of apprehension, lack of confidence, or awkwardness experienced when a person is in proximity to, approaching, or being approached by other people, especially in new situations or with unfamiliar people.”

Introversion – Wikipedia: “The trait of extroversion-introversion is a central dimension of human personality. Extroverts (also spelled extraverts) tend to be sociable, assertive, and interested in seeking out excitement. Introverts, in contrast, tend to be more reserved, less outgoing, but are also marked by a richer inner world.

“They are not necessarily loners but they tend to have smaller circles of friends and are less likely to thrive on making new social contacts. Introverts are less likely to seek stimulation from others because their own thoughts and imagination are stimulating enough.”

Also see The Inner Actor site for more on sensitive actors.

Highly Sensitive books

Related pages/sites:

Introversion / shyness page

Highly Sensitive

Highly Sensitive/Facebook

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Cheryl Richardson relates an example of her own sensitivity:

“Last night I went to see a movie with a group of friends. 

“I’d heard wonderful things about the story from people whose opinion I respect, and I was so looking forward to enjoying the film.

“However, within twenty minutes of watching, I made a decision to leave the theater.

“I’m very sensitive to violence and human suffering and therefore my threshold is pretty low.”

From her article So Sensitive: Are you tired of sucking it up?

Chapter 8 of her book The Art of Extreme Self-Care is titled “You’re So Sensitive.”

Her book The Art of Extreme Self-Care: Transform Your Life One Month at a Time is available in Hardcover, Kindle, Paperback & Audiobook.

There is also a 12-session online course.

~~

Video: You’re So Sensitive: The Art of Extreme Self Care

Published on May 4, 2012 by CherylRichardsonTV. “Learn how to protect your sensitive side in this second video about The Art of Extreme Self-Care. Cheryl Richardson is the New York Times bestselling author of several books including, Take Time for Your Life, Life Makeovers, Stand Up for Your Life, The Unmistakable Touch of Grace, The Art of Extreme Self Care and her new book with Louise Hay called You Can Create an Exceptional Life.”

Thanks to Jacquelyn Strickland (co-creator of the HSP Gathering Retreats ™ along with Dr. Elaine Aron) for mentioning this video on her Facebook page.

She comments that this video from Cheryl Richardson is ‘on the positives of being a HSP & “taking care of your sensitive self.” Her book, The Art of Extreme Self-Care has a chapter on The Highly Sensitive Person, and she credits Elaine Aron in this chapter. I’m pretty sure Cheryl is a HSS, Extravert HSP as well.’

[HSS is High Sensation Seeking - see Elaine Aron's page for more info: Personality and Temperament: The Highly Sensitive Person Who Is Also A High Sensation Seeker.]

~~

Also see more posts on High Sensitivity

and the Highly Sensitive site and Highly Sensitive / Facebook

~~

“I never wanted to be Marilyn – it just happened. Marilyn’s like a veil I wear over Norma Jeane.”

“I used to think as I looked out on the Hollywood night, ‘There must be thousands of girls sitting alone like me dreaming of being a movie star.’ But I’m not going to worry about them. I’m dreaming the hardest.”

In many biographies, interviews and her own writings, Marilyn Monroe expressed a wide range of feelings and insights on being an actor that can still be meaningful for performers and other artists.

[Photo: Portrait of Actress Marilyn Monroe on Patio of Her Home, by Alfred Eisenstaedt.]

That first quote, about ‘Marilyn’ being a ‘veil’ she wore over her earlier identity, comes from a Vanity Fair article: The Lost Marilyn Monroe Nudes: Outtakes from Her Last On-Set Shoot Revealed in June’s V.F. (May 1 2012), which includes excerpts from Lawrence Schiller’s memoir Marilyn & Me: A Photographer’s Memories.

Acclaimed for her portrayal of Monroe in “My Week With Marilyn,” based on extensive research, Michelle Williams commented: “The biggest discovery I made was that Marilyn Monroe was a character she played.”

[From my post Michelle Williams on Interpreting Marilyn Monroe.]

Also see quotes by other actors in my related post Actors on building identity.

During a photography session, Marilyn Monroe told writer Schiller, “I always have a full-length mirror next to the camera when I’m doing publicity stills. That way, I know how I look.”

Schiller asked, “So, do you pose for the photographer or for the mirror?” “The mirror,” she replied without hesitating. “I can always find Marilyn in the mirror.”

But, the article continues, “Marilyn’s attitude about her sex-symbol status fluctuated wildly. While she was at times boastful of her looks and what they procured for her, she was also by turns insecure and angry.

“It’s still about nudity. Is that all I’m good for?” she demanded of Schiller. “I’d like to show that I can get publicity without using my ass or getting fired from a picture,” she continued.

“I haven’t made up my mind yet.”

[Photo from webpage: Norma Jean Dougherty before Marilyn Monroe [has quotes with multiple photos - some nudes].

An earlier article, Marilyn and Her Monsters, by Sam Kashner (Vanity Fair, Nov 2010) includes many quotes from the book Fragments: Poems, Intimate Notes, Letters – by Marilyn Monroe, edited by Stanley Buchthal and Bernard Comment.

Kashner writes about her shyness or insecurity as an acting student.

“She was always late for class, usually arriving just before they closed the doors. The teacher was strict about not entering in the middle of an exercise or, God forbid, in the middle of a scene. Slipping in without makeup, her luminous hair hidden under a scarf, she tried to make herself inconspicuous.

“She usually took a seat in the back of one of the dingy rooms in the Malin Studios, on 46th Street, smack in the middle of the theater district. When she raised her hand to speak, it was in a tiny wisp of a voice. She didn’t want to draw attention to herself, but it was hard for the other students not to know that the most famous movie star in the world was in their acting class.

“A few blocks away, above Loew’s State Theater, at 45th and Broadway, there was the other Marilyn—the one everyone knew—52 feet tall, in that infamous billboard advertising Billy Wilder’s The Seven Year Itch, a hot blast from the subway grating causing her white dress to billow up around her thighs, her face an explosion of joy.”

Monroe “began working with Lee Strasberg and embarked upon the psychoanalysis that was de rigueur for taking classes at the Actors Studio.”

Mental health and challenging relationships

Her mother, Gladys Monroe Baker, “was a schizophrenic who spent years in and out of psychiatric hospitals… Marilyn was virtually abandoned, raised by various foster families and by Grace Goddard, a close friend of her mother’s.”

When she was just 16, the article notes, she married James Dougherty.

“My relationship with him was basically insecure from the first night I spent alone with him,” she wrote in a long, undated, somewhat rambling memoir of that marriage, probably written by hand after undergoing analysis…”

She wrote, “I was greatly attracted to him as one of the [“only” is crossed out] few young men I had no sexual repulsion for besides which it gave me a false sense of security to feel that he was endowed with more overwelming qualities which I did not possess—on paper it all begins to sound terribly logical but the secret midnight meetings the fugetive glance stolen in others company the sharing of the ocean, moon & stars and air aloneness made it a romantic adventure which a young, rather shy girl who didn’t always give that impression because of her desire to belong & develope can thrive on—I had always felt a need to live up to that expectation of my elders.”

In one of her notebooks, the article notes, Monroe wrote about being punished by her great-aunt Ida Martin, a strict, evangelical Christian paid by Grace Goddard to look after Norma Jeane for several months from 1937 to 1938.

Marilyn wrote,

Ida—I have still
been obeying her—
it’s not only harmful
for me to do so
but unrealality because
life starts from Now

And later:

working (doing my tasks that I
have set for myself)
On the stage—I will
not be punished for it
or be whipped
or be threatened
or not be loved
or sent to hell to burn with bad people
feeling that I am also bad.
or be afraid of my [genitals] being
or ashamed
exposed known and seen—?so what
or ashamed of my
sensitive feelings—

~ ~

Do you relate to some of Marilyn Monroe’s struggles with identity and esteem?

I certainly do. One of the challenges many of us share is in developing healthy self concept and esteem.

I am not a clinical psychologist or analyst, and am not attempting here to “explain” her complex inner life.

The majority of actors and other artists may not have had a schizophrenic parent and the level of abusive, traumatic childhood Monroe had, but many of the talented actors and other artists I have researched (over the past 15 years and more) talk about at least some of the same kinds of feelings, personality traits and mental health challenges.

Even highly talented and accomplished people have insecurities around self esteem issues, and sometimes difficult experiences dealing with parents, caregivers and other authority figures – like movie directors.

Here are a couple of my related posts:
‘I’m a Fraud’: Gifted and talented with insecurity
Artistic confidence – Insecurity and acting

Most of us have felt insecure to some degree, and have developed beliefs about our worth based on our early lives.

Many psychologists and others provide at least some helpful explanations for how these self perceptions and feelings develop, and what to do about changing them.

George Pratt, PhD and Peter Lambrou, PhD developed an approach called Emotional Self-Management for overcoming limiting feelings and beliefs. In their book “Code to Joy” they provide insights on their contributions to the new field of energy psychology, and provide strategies.

The book notes: “There’s hardly a child alive who hasn’t been told that he or she has been ‘bad’ by someone he or she trusts and respects. For a young child, still struggling to carve a sense of identity out of the welter of everyday experiences, simply being told ‘No!’ or ‘Don’t do that!’ can be received as the message, ‘You are wrong!’ ‘You are bad!’ That’s normal; it happens to all of us. For some, though, the accusation sticks.”

[Photo: Emily Browning, Jim Carrey, Liam Aiken in "Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events" (2004) - from article Why Does The World Suffer From An Epidemic Of Low Self-Esteem? by Morty Lefkoe.]

In another article of his, How To Change “Human Nature, Lefkoe describes some of the common sources of negative self-esteem beliefs of the kind Marilyn Monroe expressed, that grow out of relationships with parents or caregivers.

Maybe you can relate to some of these ideas on how we can develop self esteem issues:

If I trust my parents and they must know what they are doing, and if they are angry with me, it must be my fault. I’m not good enough.

If I can’t get them to spend the time with me that I want or if they are physically around but not paying attention to me, it must be my fault. I’m not important.

If I can’t get them to give me what I want most of the time, it must be my fault. I’m not worthy or deserving.

Morty Lefkoe is president and founder of the Lefkoe Institute, which teaches and publishes methods to “help people free themselves from their self-imposed limitations” and self-limiting beliefs.

You can try the Lefkoe Method free at ReCreateYourLife.

~ ~

At her death at age 36, acting teacher Lee Strasberg noted in his eloquent eulogy:

“In her eyes and mine, her career was just beginning. The dream of her talent, which she had nurtured as a child, was not a mirage.”

A Wikipedia page states: “In 1999, Monroe was ranked as the sixth greatest female star of all time by the American Film Institute. In the years and decades following her death, Monroe has often been cited as both a pop and a cultural icon as well as the quintessential American sex symbol.”

The Wikipedia article also says: “The circumstances of her death, from an overdose of barbiturates, have been the subject of conjecture. Though officially classified as a “probable suicide”, the possibility of an accidental overdose, as well as of homicide, have not been ruled out.”

~ ~

Article continued: Marilyn Monroe: Her complex Inner Life – Part 2

~~~

It doesn’t always work out that way.

In her Unwrapping the Gifted post “Multipotentiality,” K-12 gifted education specialist Tamara Fisher quotes Bryant (a pseudonym), a graduating senior who lists his possible future careers as “applied psychologist, scientific psychologist, college teacher, philosophy, mathematics, architect, engineer.”

He says, “I find it difficult to choose between careers because I fear how large the choice is. Having many options available is pleasant, but to determine what I will do for many years to come is scary.”

Fisher notes, “Multipotentiality is the state of having many exceptional talents, any one or more of which could make for a great career for that person.

“Gifted children often (though of course not always) have multipotentiality. Their advanced intellectual abilities and their intense curiosity make them prime candidates for excelling in multiple areas. This can be both a blessing and a curse.

“On the bright side, they have many realistic options for future careers. But on the downside, some of them will struggle mightily trying to decide which choice to make.”

Fisher adds that having “so many great possible outcomes can be a source of debilitating stress.”

Too many options

In her post Multipotentiality: When High Ability Leads to Too Many Options, Lisa Rivero describes Jason, a college junior, who “is trying to decide what to do after graduation. He is leaning strongly toward graduate school but is unsure of whether he wants to stay in the United States or study abroad. An honors student at a liberal arts university, he has taken a wide variety of courses–from chemistry and calculus to philosophy and political science–and he has gotten As in all of them.

“While he knows he is fortunate to have so many options available, he also sometimes panics that he will make the wrong choice and end up in a job he doesn’t like. If he gets a Ph.D. in political science, will he be tracked into being a college professor? If he pursues a master’s program in economics, will he regret not continuing with political science? And what about all of those classical languages he has studied? Were they just a waste of time?”

She adds, “This frustration can continue past adolescence as adults with multipotentiality may find themselves drifting from job to job, unable to settle in any spot long enough to know if it would satisfy over the long term, feeling that their lives and careers are a hodge-podge of failed attempts.”

Too little challenge?

In the case of Jason, Rivero writes, “Rather than indicating that he is equally good at everything, his college career thus far might instead be an indication that he is not being challenged at a level to show relative passions and aptitudes. Perhaps he would continue to thrive and be engaged in graduate-level math but find post-college classical languages more frustrating and less interesting.

“Alternatively, he might excel in a job that allows him to use his knowledge of Latin and Greek and Sanskrit but find that his interest in political science wanes once it becomes more specialized or practical. In addition, his temperament may determine whether the pursuit of research, teaching, or field work is the most comfortable fit.

RIvero explains, “The authors of the Journal of Counseling Psychology article describe this good fit as ‘optimal adjustment’ – a match between personal abilities, personal preferences, and requirements and rewards from the workplace environment.”

Parts of this article were adapted from Lisa Rivero’s book A Parent’s Guide to Gifted Teens: Living with Intense and Creative Adolescents. [The image is also from the article.]

And that can be true for adults too. Of course many people are able to realize multiple talents.

In my Psych Central post Amber Benson on Writing: Creating is Kind of Intoxicating, I wrote about actor Amber Benson (Tara on “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”) who also has multiple credits as a novelist and screenwriter, director and producer.

Gordon Parks (1912-2006) was often referred to as a renaissance man.

An obituary noted, “In addition to his photography, film work and poetry, he composed a symphony, sonatas, concertos, film scores, and wrote novels, instructional photography manuals, essays and three memoirs.” (From my post Being “scattered” and proud of it.)

But having advanced potential and exceptional capabilities in many talent areas also means, almost by definition, you are underachieving: you can’t do everything.

One of the pleasures of my life has been pursuing serial interests in often radically different fields: being a research assistant in genetics and later in left/right brain wave research; a visual effects camera operator, and multiple other jobs and pursuits.

But one of the ‘costs’ has been a life unmoored to any career, and many periods of anxiety and self-doubt.

Thankfully this series of sites I have created is not only creatively rewarding, but also of some value to other people.

Related:

Underutilized talents, too many aptitudes

The Too Many Aptitudes Problem, by Hank Pfeffer
“Most people have about four or five strong talents… Most jobs require about four or five. As many as 10% of the population has double that number of aptitudes… There is evidence that people with too many aptitudes (TMAs) are less likely to obtain advanced education and/or succeed in a career than those with an average number of talents.”

Adult underachievement – not living up to our high potential
In a very real sense, everyone may be called “underachieving” regardless of whether they are gifted or not. One short definition is “Performance below potential.”

Are you a scanner personality? Maybe all you need is a good enough job.
Barbara Sher writes about and leads retreats for Scanners – “also known as renaissance men and women, eclectic experts, happy amateurs and delighted dilettantes.”

Book: Your Own Worst Enemy: Breaking the Habit of Adult Underachievement
- by Kenneth W. Christian, PhD.

Related post: Adult Underachievement: Kenneth Christian, Ph.D. on living up to the “gifted” label – or not

~~~~

Book: Developing Multiple Talents – The personal side of creative expression
- by me, Douglas Eby
“Part book about creativity, part compendium of useful tidbits, quotations and research, and part annotated bibliography, this is a wildly useful and highly entertaining resource.” – Stephanie S. Tolan, fiction writer and consultant on the needs of the gifted.

~~~~

Program / ebook: Renaissance Business – “Specifically for the Multi-Passionate Entrepreneur”
Author Emilie Wapnick notes, “My resume reads like it belongs to ten different people. Music, film, web design, law, business, personal development, writing, dance, sexuality, education– all of these are or have been interests of mine. They come and go (and sometimes come again).

Video: A Disturbing Trend in the Blogosphere…
“Why are all these successful multipotentialite entrepreneurs telling us to “pick one thing” when they themselves USED their diverse background to build their business?!”

Related: The Productivity for Multipotentialites Course – “Ah, isn’t it lovely having so many different interests? Being a multipotentialite is wonderful, except when it comes to actually getting all of those great projects done.”

Productivity for Multipotentialites is “a complete productivity system for multipotentialites. Throughout the classes, you will be introduced to a number of practices and rituals to help you integrate all of your passions into your life, without the stress.”

~~

This is a theme of his upcoming book “The Charge: Activating the 10 Human Drives that Make You Feel Alive.”

There are already enthusiastic testimonials including these:

“The Charge is an inspiring guide to the one thing we all want: more life in our lives. Brendon Burchard proves that we can harness our emotional drives to feel more alive, and that it’s our internal charge that helps us meet life’s challenges with joy and courage. I love this book.”

—Paulo Coelho, New York Times best-selling author of The Alchemist

“There hasn’t been a game-changing book on personal development in a long time. The wait is over. The Charge confronts our very notions of what drives us as humans, and it brilliantly illuminates the path for how you can feel more alive, productive, and fulfilled. After reading this book you’ll find a new internal charge that’s stronger and more energized than you ever imagined possible.”

—Jack Canfield, New York Times best-selling author of The Success Principles and originator of the Chicken Soup for the Soul® series

“The Charge will change your life. Our brains are hard wired to meet specific human drives, and learning to harness and activate those drives is the secret to success and happiness. This is a smart and beautifully written book, and it will electrify your life. Get this book!”

—Daniel G. Amen, MD, New York Times best-selling author of Change Your Brain, Change Your Life and Magnificent Mind at Any Age

“Every once in a while you read a book that completely changes how you think about your life, igniting within you a new internal drive to be more, do more, and give more. This is that kind of book.”

—David Bach, New York Times best-selling author of The Automatic Millionaire

“I look for authenticity and proof when I learn from someone, and I can share that Brendon Burchard is one of the most engaged, energetic, and enthusiastic people I’ve ever met. I’ve always wanted to know how he developed such a remarkably strong internal charge. This book reveals his secrets. If you too want to perform at higher levels of joy, engagement, and productivity — buy this book. It’s a must-read for any serious student of success and high performance.”

—Darren Hardy, Publisher SUCCESS magazine, best-selling author of The Compound Effect and Living Your Best Year Ever

Get more free videos by Brendon Burchard, and a free copy [you pay shipping] of his new hardcover book

The Charge: Activating the 10 Human Drives that Make You Feel Alive

~~~~~

More personal change books and resources:

Tapping Into Ultimate Success: How to Overcome Any Obstacle and Skyrocket Your Results
by Jack Canfield and Pamela Bruner – about Meridian Tapping, sometimes known as Emotional Freedom Techniques.

- Also see article What is EFT? – or visit the site of The Tapping Solution.

~~~~~

This is a book I have just started to read and am finding it to be a helpful tool for self-understanding, especially with its questions to explore life experiences that impact our positive self regard and confidence.  [Douglas Eby, author/editor of this site.]

Code to Joy: The Four-Step Solution to Unlocking Your Natural State of Happiness, by George Pratt, PhD and Peter Lambrou, PhD. http://vsb.li/BwD4k4

“We are meant to be happy. Instinctively, we all know this, somewhere deep inside. We all know what it’s like to feel a burst of delight. Every one of us has at some point in our lives experienced a sense of ecstatic joy, of euphoria at the sheer sensation of being alive. Have you ever wondered why that experience has to be so rare and fleeting? The answer is, It doesn’t.” —From the book.

“All the positive thinking, affirmations, talk therapy, and pharmaceuticals in the world will never be enough to make us as happy as we were designed to be, according to acclaimed clinical psychologists George Pratt, Ph.D., and Peter Lambrou, Ph.D. That’s because those approaches fail to address a third aspect of the human organism, one that bridges the gap between mind and body: the biofield.” [Amazon summary]

One of the issues (which we all face) in this book “Code To Joy” is self-limiting beliefs – which Morty Lefkoe addresses in his multiple articles on my sites, such as Why Self-Help Often Doesn’t Work.

Visit his site ReCreate Your Life to eliminate a self-limiting belief free.

~~