Resetting our happiness set point
In her book The How of Happiness: A Scientific Approach to Getting the Life You Want she explains, “50 percent of individual differences in happiness are governed by genes, 10 percent by life circumstances, and the remaining 40 percent by what we do and how we think - that is, our intentional activities and strategies.
“The secret of course lies in that 40 percent. If we observe genuinely happy people, we shall find that they do not just sit around being contented. They make things happen. They pursue new understandings, seek new achievements, and control their thoughts and feelings.
“In sum, our intentional, effortful activities have a powerful effect on how happy we are, over and above the effects of our set points and the circumstances in which we find themselves.
“If an unhappy person wants to experience interest, enthusiasm, contentment, peace, and joy, he or she can make it happen by learning the habits of a happy person.
She adds in her Psychology Today blog What Influences Our Happiness The Most? that “the set point for happiness is similar to the set point for weight. Some people are blessed with a “skinny disposition.” Even when they’re not trying, they easily maintain their weight. By contrast, others have to work extraordinarily hard to keep their weight at a desirable level and the moment they slack off even a bit, the pounds creep back on.”
She says that “Much like permanent weight loss and fitness, becoming lastingly happier demands making some permanent changes, requiring effort and commitment every day of one’s life.”
May 11th, 2008 at 1:16 pm
That 40% does make a big difference. I’ve tried to alter my personality back to its “set point” and have had marginal success over the last couple years. Still a long way to go, but I would say that I was happier more recently than I was a few years ago — even last year (which was not good).
Only 10% accounts for life circumstances? I always felt this was the biggest detriment to my set point, thoughts, and success. I still think it is. Maybe I’m wrong.
Oh well, I guess I’ll just keep improving despite others. All I can do. The “frame of thought” tips did help me lose weight when I did that, so I know they work.
May 12th, 2008 at 10:24 am
Living a happy life becomes a way of life.
It is said that it takes 30 day to create habit. So, each morning for 30 days, write out a gratitude list. Ten new things that you are grateful for.
During the day, if you start to slump a bit, take out the list and review your gratitude points. Dwell on what makes you grateful instead of the things that make you hateful.
Also, if you must watch the news, do not do it just before going to bed. It seems as if when the last thing you have on your mind before going to bed will sit there and cultivate all night.
Life is as good as I allow it to be.