*Books:
 

self-doubting / self sabotage There is nothing more frustrating than getting to the verge of success then shooting ourselves in the foot. It begins when the computer of oneself was being programmed at an early age, an incident or incidents happened that affected the way that we think about success. Competition breeds self sabotage. Whenever we enter a competition, exam, contest we will project into a desired outcome. For example an outcome of winning a competition, or getting selected to represent our team, or winning a promotion.

Now supposing that outcome is not realized and someone else wins the prize or gets the promotion. What we are left with is our 'projection of success' not being realised. This mental energy, which is what it actually is, turns to disappointment, then perhaps bitterness, if we do not resolve the outcome in ourselves. This perhaps leads to the world view, that the world is unfair, that others get better opportunity than we do and so forth. If left unchecked this creates a perfect ecology for self sabotage. We then start to think about ourselves as someone who doesn't get selected, win the promotions, make the big sales, and behave in a way, that confirms this view of ourselves. This is self sabotage. In the book, you can go through an exercise that will help you build an antidote to self sabotage. Martin Perry - coach, and author of ebook Supreme Confidence for Self Doubters

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The Impostor Syndrome How to Feel As Bright and Capable As Everyone Seems to Think You Are Dr. Valerie Young's often humorous and always on target insight into why so many bright, capable women seem to doubt their competence.  Learn what the Impostor Syndrome is -- and isn't. This live presentation includes strategies to help you to start seeing yourself as the intelligent and competent person you really are. handbook / ebook / CD program from Changing Course

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born with an artist's soul I was born with an artist's soul. I came to create the new. Maybe you were too. Today, my mission is to support creative people, pioneers, visionaries, innovators, leaders, and dreamers. Your love is your energy. And your love is more powerful than the "real world." When you value your talents, you unleash creative potential beyond anyone's prediction.  Do not limit yourself to a world of the past, the world you can see. Because: The real you can change the real world. Tama J. Kieves - Trusting the Journey Times E-Zine Jan/Feb 2004

Is there a place in your life where you feel like you are in-between times? Or where you feel like things aren't yet clear, resolved, or obviously on track? Let's stop apologizing for being somewhere new in our lives. Let's applaud our confusion and hesitancy. If you're in the muck, you're in process, which means you're moving, shaking things up, redefining yourself and plumbing new territories.  You feel small because you are expanding. You are growing beyond your past accomplishments, identity, and limits. Tama J. Kieves - Trusting the Journey Times [Sept/Oct 2003] - available from Tama Kieves' site Awakening Artistry ..her book:**This Time I Dance! Trusting the Journey of Creating the Work You Love: How One Harvard Lawyer Left It All to Have It All!

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I wish I'd known from the beginning that I was born a strong woman. What a difference it would have made!  I wish I'd known that I was born a courageous woman; I've spent so much of my life cowering. How many conversations would I not only have started but finished if I had known I possessed a warrior's heart? I wish I'd known that I'd been born to take on the world; I wouldn't have run from it for so long, but run to it with open arms.

"Many women today feel a sadness we cannot name. Though we accomplish much of what we set out to do, we sense that something is missing in our lives and -- fruitlessly -- search 'out there' for answers," writer Emily Hancock observes.  "What's often wrong is that we are disconnected from an authentic sense of self." ...from Something More: Excavating Your Authentic Self  by Sarah Ban Breathnach -- photo from her site

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**more books:
 

Melody Beattie. Stop Being Mean to Yourself: A Story About Finding the True Meaning of Self-Love

books by Nathaniel Branden, PhD:

Honoring the Self : The Psychology of Confidence and Respect

Self Esteem at Work

A Woman's Self-Esteem: Struggles and Triumphs in the Search for Identity

How to Raise Your Self-Esteem: The Proven Action-Oriented Approach to
Greater Self-Respect and Self-Confidence

David Burns, MD. Ten Days to Self-Esteem

Gervase R. Bushe, Ph.D. --Clear Leadership: How Outstanding Leaders Make Themselves Understood, Cut Through Organizational Mush, and Help Everyone Get Real at Work
"Most people understand the critical role of self-esteem in the lives of people who accomplish and succeed. Without self-esteem even the most talented fail. We know that if we constantly criticize a child, telling them they aren't good enough... they develop an inferiority complex. What happens to a team or organization that gets the same message? What happens to people when most or all of their organizational life is lived in gap land? ... What happens when we let go of a deficit mindset and develop an appreciative mindset?"

Jack Canfield. Self Esteem and Peak Performance [Audio Cassette]
A program for anyone who wants to achieve high personal and professional success

Stephanie Dillon Ph.D., Christina Benson M.D.  The Woman's Guide to Total Self-Esteem: The Eight Secrets You Need to Know
"By identifying and understanding destructive beliefs, women can gradually acquire (or repair) a healthy and fulfilling image of themselves. Clear demonstrations with related exercises show how to develop the eight building blocks of self-esteem: healthy entitlement; the courage to feel; self-objectivity; self-assertion; body acceptance; emotional balance; self-advocacy; and self-nurturing. The book concludes with the suggestion that gaining self-esteem is a lifelong process, and that life’s crises can be opportunities for growth and a more lasting sense of worth. [Amazon.com summary]

Paul & Sarah Edwards. The Practical Dreamer's Handbook
"Ancient decisions you made as a young boy or girl about what you can and cannot do, or will and will not do, are keeping you from doing what you most want to do now."

Sarah Ferguson. .What I Know Now : Simple Lessons Learned the Hard Way

Robert J. Furey. You Are Good Enough : Overcoming Feelings of Inadequacy

Carolyn Gage. Like There's No Tomorrow: Meditations for Women Leaving Patriarchy
"I was more deeply moved and 'sinspired' by Carolyn Gage's new book than by anything else I've read in years. Like There's No Tomorrow has qualities rarely seen in current "theory." It is a work of burning, uncompromising vision and daring... a beacon of hope in these chilling times of compromise, timidity and apparent defeat. This book is Pure Fire. It is true and therefore extreme... a stunning manifestation of Radical Lesbian Feminist Courage and Genius." Mary Daly, Radical Feminist Philosopher and author of Pure Lust, Gyn/Ecology, and Outercourse:

Barbara Becker Holstein. The Enchanted Self

Cheri Huber. There Is Nothing Wrong With You: For Teens
".. a very good self-help book for teens, dealing with self-esteem, which especially applies to young women, because female teens are so much more critical of themselves. Book is written from a Buddhist perspective.." [from reader review]

Matthew McKay, Patrick Fanning. Self-Esteem: A Proven Program of Cognitive Techniques for Assessing, Improving, and Maintaining Your Self-Esteem

Nancy J. Napier. Recreating Your Self: Building Self-Esteem Through Imaging and Self-Hypnosis

Christiane Northrup, MD. Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom
"Our entire society functions under many shared and sometimes harmful beliefs. ... So it is that we can be sure the events of our childhood set the stage for our beliefs about ourselves and therefore our experience."

Peggy Orenstein. SchoolGirls: Young Women, Self-Esteem, and the Confidence Gap

Steve Salerno. Sham: How the Self-Help Movement Made America Helpless
Self-help's big lie - By Steve Salerno [excerpt from article, LA Times, Jan 1 2006]
EVER SINCE the United States began weaning itself off the sociological junk food of victimization and its culture of blame, the pop-psychology menu increasingly has been flavored by an antithetical concept — empowerment — that can be summarized as: Believe it, achieve it. ...
Lost in the adulation is the downside of being uplifted. In truth, the overselling of personal empowerment — the hyping of hope — may be the great unsung irony of modern American life, destined to disappoint as surely as the pity party that it was meant to replace. ... You cannot have a life plan predicated on the belief that everything is equally achievable to you — especially if that same message has been sold indiscriminately to all comers. In the grand scheme of things, knowing one's limitations may be even more important than knowing one's talents.

Glenn R. Schiraldi, Ph.D., et al. The Self-Esteem Workbook

Susannah Sheffer. A Sense of Self : Listening to Homeschooled Adolescent Girls
A response to the many reports and studies documenting how girls lose their sense of self and self-esteem during adolescence, interviewing homeschooled girls and analyzing their different perspectives from the general population. Although Sheffer (editor, Growing without Schooling magazine) does not advocate homeschooling as a solution to this problem, her insights and those of the young women she interviews give voice to the tremendous pressures on adolescent girls to conform to subservient models, and the efficacy of providing structures where they are shielded from dampening influences--allowing them to flourish. [Book News review]

Laura L. Smith and Charles H. Elliott. Hollow Kids: Recapturing the Soul of a Generation Lost to the Self-Esteem Myth
This book has a very straightforward thesis ? the Self-Esteem Movement, which made raising the esteem of mainly young people the panacea of all personal and social ills... has not only failed to cure the ills which it was designed to combat but, on the contrary, has produced a generation of children who are narcissistic, self-absorbed, lacking in real values, prone to self-destructive habits and violent towards others. ... The authors.. are practising psychologists and specialists in school (L.L.Smith) or paediatric (C.H.Elliott) psychology. Both are clinical psychologists and faculty members at the Fielding Graduate Institute.
[from Metapsychology review mentalhelp.net

Marilyn J. Sorensen, PhD. Breaking the Chain of Low Self-Esteem

Marilyn J. Sorensen, PhD. Low Self-Esteem Misunderstood & Misdiagnosed

William Swann, PhD.  Self-Traps : The Elusive Quest for Higher Self-Esteem

...................self-esteem / self concept.: page 3.....self-esteem / self concept.: page 4.......

...change / growth resources : books  sites  articles.......nurturing talent / achievement : sites

related pages:.......fear.......identity..........ego / narcissism..........androgyny..........eccentricity

 
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