Envy is an insult to oneself. Yevgeny Yevtushenko Envy is human nature. Monica Bellucci A simple dictionary definition of envy is “a feeling of discontent or covetousness with regard to another’s advantages, success, possessions, etc.” In this famous shot of Sophia Loren (left) and Jayne Mansfield at a Beverly Hills restaurant in 1957, Loren may [...]
Like many actors and artists, Alan Rickman is a complex mix of passions and personality. He talks about his love and respect for writing, and the insecurity and self-criticism that so many creative people experience. He has portrayed many powerful and intriguing characters, including Severus Snape in the Harry Potter series. In this video about [...]
Playing most of his screen characters, Will Smith exudes assurance and confidence, but he admits, “I still doubt myself every single day. What people believe is my self-confidence is actually my reaction to fear.” [From my post Gifted and talented but with insecurity and low self esteem, and a longer quote in the post The [...]
“I can be very hard on myself. I convince myself that I’m fooling people. Or, I convince myself that people like the book for the wrong reasons.” Jonathan Safran Foer – about his novel Everything Is Illuminated, which made The New York Times best-seller list. He also commented, “The writing itself is no big deal. [...]
Talking about the topic of her movie “Marie Antoinette,” director Sofia Coppola once commented, “You’re considered superficial and silly if you are interested in fashion, but I think you can be substantial and still be interested in frivolity.” One way many talented people can be self-critical is to judge their wide-ranging serial interests as superficial [...]
What are some of the considerations that lead sensitive and gifted adults to take psychiatric medications? What are some of the reasons people stop taking medications?? What are the alternatives? My inner life, and sometimes my outer life, is painful/chaotic/confusing. The DSM symptoms list for certain mental illnesses seem to fit me so I must [...]
What makes creative and highly sensitive people accept, and even welcome, a diagnosis of bipolar disorder or other mental illness? Are psychiatrists equipped to recognize and support creativity, high sensitivity and giftedness? Who determines where creative intensity ends and mental illness begins? Do medications put our creativity and sensitivity at risk? Over a year and [...]
One of my constant internal dialogs revolves around whether or not I’m being authentic. Am I compromising myself? Trying too hard to avoid conflict by keeping silent? Is my desire to have other people feel understood an authentic part of me or counterproductive? And just because a trait is authentic, should I nurture it? Personal [...]
The internal vision I have of my novel seems so superior to what I’ve actually written that I’m often paralyzed into inaction. I took about a year off from working on it – that sounds so much better than saying I just couldn’t face it. Now I’m back in the fray and struggling with the [...]
I could write a few novels with the material from my romantic and work relationships. Lots of drama and disappointment, and loads of self-recrimination. How does giftedness figure into the patterns of our connections with others? In this excerpt from his article, Solutions for the Problems of Giftedness, Richard O’Connor, Ph.D., gives some interesting answers. [...]
My very well-meaning parents were far from Mommie Dearest. Nevertheless, they were raised to believe, for instance, that babies shouldn’t be picked up when they cried because comforting them would ‘spoil’ them. They were very sparing in their compliments, fearing we’d get swelled heads. We kids survived, but thriving has been a challenge for me, [...]
Charlie Rose introduced Tilda Swinton, an interview guest on his show: “With her magnetic, ethereal charisma and striking androgynous looks, she has perhaps become most famous for her screen interpretations of cold and enigmatic characters. “Her performances are subtle, varied, and unique.” Yet, she admitted, “I certainly never set out to be an actor, and [...]
In her article, How To Stop Being So Hard On Yourself, excerpted below, expert on highly sensitive living Jenna Avery explains why sensitive people are so self-critical, and how we can stop: Every time I work with a fellow sensitive soul, it seems like we always bump into some kind of fear or limiting belief [...]
“You’ll never finish your novel.” “You’ve wasted your life.” “You’re too complicated. Who would ever want to be with you?” Sometimes my inner critical voice is so clear I can argue with it. Most of the time, the negativity I wreak upon myself is unconscious and harder to fight. Lisa Firestone and Eric Maisel provide [...]
Is it always a good idea to do the best you can do? Moreover, can we ever be sure that it’s really our best? These questions came up recently in a therapy session and catalyzed my looking more deeply into the nature and implications of this common expression. The man with whom I was working [...]
These quotes by Gerard Butler are from Erik Hedegaard’s profile, Gerry the Sinner / Gerry the Saint, Men’s Journal, April 2010. That I got through all that I got through to be where I am, it doesn’t make sense — this kind of lost soul studying law in Scotland and then moving to London with [...]
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Site author: Douglas Eby, M.A./Psychology, is a writer and researcher on the psychology of creative expression and personal growth, especially for high ability adults. He is publisher of the Talent Development Resources series of sites.
